The Way We Speak, What We Speak and When We Speak
10/19/03
The way we speak, what we speak and when
we speak, has the power to build or destroy--our own life and the lives of
those around us.
Ja. 1:26 If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight
rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.
The Way We Speak...
Pr. 16:23 A wise man’s heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote
instruction.
24 Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing
to the bones.
Someone has said that ninety percent of the friction in marriage is caused
by the wrong tone of voice.
I miss my dad. It’s true that when you loose a loved one you rethink a lot
of things. I wish I would have had more conversations with my dad before he
passed away. He was a very intelligent man and he had a remarkable memory. It
was hard to talk to my dad. It was hard for any of us to talk to dad. He became
easily angered and emotional, harsh and loud and so everybody was shut down.
What happens is this. If we think what we have to say is right, then we
think it doesn’t matter how we say it--but it does matter.
It’s pretty sad when someone has the right information but no one wants to hear
it!
If you can’t listen to others, who wants to listen to you?
Pr. 18:13 He who answers before listening—that is
his folly and his shame.
The greatest test of a person’s character is his tongue.
Pr. 18:24 (KJV) A man that hath friends must show
himself friendly...
Here’s a couple of very good statements:
It would be better to leave people wondering why
you didn't talk than why you did.
It is usually the person with a big mouth that
bites off more than he can chew.
What We Speak...
A slip of the foot you may soon recover, But a slip of the tongue you may
never get over. Benjamin Franklin
How rightly it was said: “If your mind should go blank, don't forget to turn
off the sound.”
Ja. 3:1 Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because
you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. 2 We all
stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a
perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.
3 When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey
us, we can turn the whole animal. 4 Or take ships as an example.
Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by
a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. 5 Likewise the
tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a
great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6 The tongue also is a
fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole
person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by
hell.
7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea
are being tamed and have been tamed by man, 8 but no man can tame the tongue.
It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we
curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. 10 Out of the same
mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. 11
Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? 12 My
brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a
salt spring produce fresh water.
What we say can bring life or death!
Again it’s been well said: “If you have to lose your head, at least hold
your tongue.”
Pr. 12:18 Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise
brings healing.
Pr. 15:4 The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful
tongue crushes the spirit.
Mat. 12:36 But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment
for every careless word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you
will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”
Seven words cost Zechariah nine months of silence!
Lk. 1:18 Zechariah asked the angel, “How can I be
sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.”
19 The angel answered, “I am Gabriel. I
stand in the presence of God, and I have been sent to speak to you and to tell
you this good news. 20 And now you will be silent and not able to
speak until the day this happens, because you did not believe my words, which
will come true at their proper time.”
A gossip is Satan’s delight!
Pr. 11:13 A gossip betrays a confidence, but a
trustworthy man keeps a secret.
Pr. 16:28 A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a
gossip separates close friends.
Pr. 20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a
man who talks too much.
When To Speak...
There’s a reason why God gave us two ears and one mouth!
It takes us two years to learn to talk and a lifetime to learn how to shut up!
Ja. 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick
to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry...
Pr. 10:19 When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his
tongue is wise.
Pr. 11:12 A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbor, but a man of
understanding holds his tongue.
Pr. 17:27 A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of
understanding is even-tempered.
28 Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he
holds his tongue.
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let
people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
I have done a considerable amount of marriage counseling. And by far, the
number one problem in marriages is communication!
Communication is a skill to be learned.
There is an art in speaking and an art in listening.
Our eternal destiny will be determined by
what we say!
Pr. 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it
will eat its fruit.
Ro. 10:9 That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe
in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10
For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with
your mouth that you confess and are saved.
Mat. 10:32 “Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him
before my Father in heaven. 33 But whoever disowns me before men, I
will disown him before my Father in heaven.