The Power of Good Communication

1/23/05

 

I do a fair amount of marriage counseling. Most professionals agree that between 80-90% of all marriage problems are a result of poor communication.

That’s interesting because poor communication with the Living God is also the greatest down fall of Christians!

Most communication problems are not from the inability to talk--but the inability to listen!

Someone has rightly said “the less people think; the more they talk.”

A gossip is one who talks to you about other people. A bore is one who talks to you about himself. And a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself.

An attractive woman was taken to dinner one night by William E. Gladstone, the distinguished British statesman. The next evening she attended a dinner where she sat next to Benjamin Disraeli, his equally distinguished opponent. Someone later asked her opinion of the two men, she replied thoughtfully: "When I left the dining room after sitting with Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest man in England. But after sitting next to Mr. Disraeli, I thought I was the cleverest woman in England."

The art of communication consists of knowing how to listen and thinking before speaking!

Ja. 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

Being a good communicator is a skill you learn, not something you are born with!

Practice these simple rules and your communication with anyone will be dramatically changed...

Don’t dominate the conversation.

Don’t cut off the other person.

Don’t be thinking of what to say until you listened to what the other person has to say.

None verbal communication is just as powerful as verbal communication.

Eye contact when speaking and listening.

Guard jesters of frustration, disagreement and impatience. (Looking at your watch).

Pr. 18:13 He who answers before listening—that is his folly and his shame.

Pr. 13:3 He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.

Pr. 29:20 Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him.

Pr. 15:28 The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.

1 Pet. 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

The activities we do for God are secondary. Above all else, God is looking for people who long for communication with him.

Ec. 5:1 Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. Go near to listen rather than to offer the sacrifice of fools, who do not know that they do wrong. 2 Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.

What does it take to have good on going communication with the Living God?

It starts with humility and repentance.

Is. 59:1 Surely the arm of the LORD is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear.  2 But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden his face from you, so that he will not hear.

You have to have new ears and new eyes and a new heart.

Ez. 36:26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.

Without the Holy Spirit living in us it’s impossible to communicate with God!

1 Cor. 2:6 We do, however, speak a message of wisdom among the mature, but not the wisdom of this age or of the rulers of this age, who are coming to nothing. 7 No, we speak of God’s secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began. 8 None of the rulers of this age understood it, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. 9 However, as it is written: “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him”— 10 but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit.  The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 11 For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man’s spirit within him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. 12 We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us. 13 This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words. 14 The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned. 15 The spiritual man makes judgments about all things, but he himself is not subject to any man’s judgment: 16 “For who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.

It’s serious business being able to hear God!

Rev. 2:7 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God.

Rev. 2:11 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. He who overcomes will not be hurt at all by the second death.

Rev. 2:17 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.

Rev. 2:29 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

Rev. 3:6 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

Rev. 3:13 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

Rev. 3:22 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

Rev. 13:9 He who has an ear, let him hear. 10 If anyone is to go into captivity, into captivity he will go. If anyone is to be killed with the sword, with the sword he will be killed. This calls for patient endurance and faithfulness on the part of the saints.

All of our communication with the Living God is through Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior!

Heb. 1:1 In the past God spoke to our forefathers through the prophets at many times and in various ways, 2 but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom he made the universe. 3 The Son is the radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word.

You must be devoted to the Word of God and prayer if you desire to have communication with the Living God!

 

 

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